6.19.2009

Happy Father's Day!

As Father's Day 2009 approaches I began to think about my own father, who provided so many life lessons, and my son, now a father himself, who has so many lessons to teach his young son. To them both I give my love, my thanks, and my appreciation for the important role they play. To them and all the fathers around the world .. Happy Father's Day!

I am truly blessed because of all the love in my family, but not all families are so lucky. What we often don't understand, and due to the way human nature works what we sometimes don't want to understand, is that no matter what kind of father we have or have had, we chose the circumstances of that relationship. Because we chose it we can change how we feel even if those feelings aren't reciprocated. There is a gift in every relationship waiting to be found. Sometimes it's a tough nut to crack, but well worth doing.

The following, from Jennifer Hoffman of Uriel Heals, offers a different view on fatherhood and the father energy. I hope it will open your eyes to the opportunity that coming to peace with your relationship with your father can be, even if he is long gone.

Healing the Father Energy

This Sunday is Father's Day, a day when fathers will receive cards and gifts that show their children's appreciation for them. This is an awkward day for many of us, because our relationship with our fathers has not been the loving, kind, compassionate image we have of fathers from Hollywood movies. Some of you had fathers who were abusive, domineering, angry, violent, who were totally absent or who were physically present but emotionally distant. No matter how you feel about your father, it is time to reconcile the father energy so we can know it for what it is, an opportunity for us to experience the male energy and reconcile our relationship with it.

In its highest expression, the father energy is an example of energy in action, complementing the nurturing and creative energy of the feminine. When we are balanced in the expression of our male and female energies we are compassionate and motivated, understanding and creative, moving forward with a clear direction and focused on living our dreams. But this is not the case for many of us because our experience of the male energy is far different.

We have lived with the imbalance of male and female energies for eons, and while that energy is shifting and we have come far, we are haunted by the memories of difficult father relationships. The young male Indigos are focused on presenting a balanced, caring, nurturing male energy to their children. For the rest of us, it is time to clear the father energy so we can shift our own energies from those that we have carried for so long into something that will help us connect with the gifts of the male energy.

On Father's Day you do not have to pretend your father was the kind, compassionate, loving and supportive father the media portrays if he was not. But remember that he was raised with the male dominant mindset and he either expressed it to an extreme or tried to hide it by being distant. Perhaps he felt unable to be a parent and he left, many fathers did that. Whatever your relationship with him was like, you chose him as your father for the lessons he could teach you. And you raised your children to be different. So forgive your father, whatever his transgressions, and give yourself peace on this day. A new aspect of fatherhood is being created that will make your suffering a thing of the past. To all of the fathers, happy father's day.

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